When the cat is away...

the mice will have a breakdown...???
It's been a few weeks now, and I think I have come to a place where I can talk about this with out losing it. So I'm going to give this a shot, it NEEDS to be documented for sure!
For those of you that don't know, every year Nate leaves everything behind for about 9 days and heads up to the Boundry Waters in Nortern Minn and Canada on a fishing trip with his buddies. We have no contact with him while he is up there *surviving*. Unfortunately there is a *curse* that comes along with his fishing trip. For several years in a row, something terrible happens while he is gone. I wish I am making this up, but it's VERY TRUE!
I believe that the beginning of the *curse* was when his Grandma passed away while he was gone. I didn't have the heart to tell him on his drive back, I waited until he got home. It wasn't too much of a shock, but sad none the less. The following year, Uncle Charlie ( like a grandpa to us) and Grandpa both became VERY ill and were placed in the ICU. Nathan was unable to really share his trip with Grandpa that year like he usually does, we lost bost Charlie and Grandpa very soon after Nate returned home.
The following year, he got some new recruits to go on his trip with him. Not thinking about the curse too much was a mistake. It was Pete's first year, and while he was up there his wife's Grandma was tragically killed in a traffic accident. Last year amazingly no one was injured here at home while there were gone. HOWEVER Nate's buddy Monty nearly lost his life up in the BWCA. He was very close to death from hypothermia from falling in the frigid lake. It's a very scary story and yet clearly God had His angels protecting him!
Of course after all this, I was a bit nervous seeing him go again this year. But God does not give one a spirit of fear. I remind myself that quite often.
About halfway through his trip my Dad gives me a call and informs me that my 88yr old Grandma had fallen alone in her home and laid waiting for help for over 3 hours. She broke her hip and injured her collarbone as well. Oh I was praying that she could surive this! I was not shocked something like this happened while Nate was gone. I guess I was expecting it. She is currently SLOWLY recovering from her injuries and surgery.
So you may ask...WHY do you let him go??? Are you CRAZY??? Yep, I must be crazy, because I do *let* him go. And I pray for his safety and our safety while he is gone. It's a blessing that he is able to go and have this much needed and derserved adventure every year.
NOW...let me talk about MY adventure while he was gone this year...
Brilliant that I am, I thought I would be totally fine scheduling 4 dentists visits the week he was gone. The part of my brain that is used ( or not used) for making decisions like this is the same part that keeps taking my kids with me when I run multiple errands and trips to the store with ALL of them, time and time again after I clearly tell myself I should NOT continue to subject myself and others to the *experience* and I'll just leave it at that. These trips are probably worthy for a whole blog post of their own!
So all was well and I was bringing all 4 kids to a NEW dentist across town. I was actually really looking forward to this new office expereince. It's all geared towards kids, video games galore! The three older kids were being seen and they all seemed to be pretty care-free about it.
I have found that in parenting ( yes I have learned *something* over the past 10 years) your children play off of the atmosphere that you create. The vibes you send out can make or brake a new expereince. So I was totally into this new dentist and the kids seem to be to..ok, so all is well so far...great! I was even at this point patting my self on the back for taking on this *adventure* on my own...I SO don't *need* Nate for this!
oops.... not so fast...
As we pulled into the parking lot it was about 8:15 am, on a school day. The kids jumped out of the car and ran into the lobby. I started filling out paperwork. NOTE about Me: I LOVE to fill out paperwork...seriously, I do, especially times 4.
Emma came up to me and informed me that Madelyn was back in the van, just sitting there. Hmmmmm...
So I went out to see what she was getting. I thought she had a book out there or something. Well I was wrong about that idea.
While I was asking her what she was doing the floodgates opened. She kept saying over and over that she just wanted to get to school. Nothing really about the dentist, just that she wanted to get to school. I tried everything to get her to come out of the van and get back into the office. I spoke VERY calmly to her ( see paretning fact above) thinking this would calm her down as well. Uh no.
She didn't budge, she had tears and snot coming down her face, refusing to get out. I had now told her that she had lost all priveledges for a week( no tv, no Wii, no computer), this I thought would have some effect. Nope. She seemed to care less about the punishment. About 10 min had now gone by. I tried everything. And yes, I flat out told her to get back inside NOW.
So now it's TWO weeks with no priveledges. Again, no effect.
WOW, I'm at a loss here. I'm praying to God for wisdom and I've got nothing!
Finally she stared showing signs of a white flag, and she got out and headed towards the office door.
Remember the tears and snot? Well she now was asking if she could go to the bathroom and get tissues. I was right on her with this one, I had a feeling this was a ploy. So, I said No, I will get them for her.
Then she added on that she needed to USE the bathroom.
Here was my BIG mistake...I let her go in! *CLICK* I heard the door lock. And that was it.
At this point Emma and Logan had their names called and were joyfully headed back to their rooms. As Madelyn's name was now called, I wondered why she didn't seem to care as I told her it was HER turn...oh yes, now I remember, geez I almost forgot. MY TEN YEAR OLD DAUGHTER WAS HAVING A BREAKDOWN AND LOCKED HERSELF IN THE DENTIST OFFICE BATHROOM!!!!!
I was blindsided! At this point two of the ladies and the d.h was trying to get her to come out. Are you wondering where Clayton is during all this...oh he was around the corning somehow getting the high score on Donkey Kong!
The d.h was getting ticked. She became the one in charge here, I guess she thought I was not doing so well. She informed Madelyn that she was waisting everyone's time and she needed to act her age and come out immediately.
How did that work??? Not so well, still no surrender by her part at all.
At this point I think a white down broke through the roof the the dentist office and landed directly onto my shoulder. I had an out of body experience and SOMEHOW BY THE GRACE OF GOD didn't lose my mind.
One of the other ladies imformed Madelyn that they would have to pick the lock( again, didn't phase her one bit), so quickly she left and came back with a bobby pin.
The door was opened and the d.h asked me if she could talk with Madelyn privately. They walked into the entry and I could only watch the conversation. It was short. The d.h came over to me and said "well she just wants to go to school I guess".
O really, that's it?!! Well then I'll rush her over there, geez if I only would have known that this morning, I could have avoided this whole show!
I was getting ticked at her at this point.
I told her, "I know she wants to go to school, that way she wouldn't have to be here. She is going into that office even if it's for ONE minute. She WILL not win!"
"oh", she said, "so she's trying to manipulate you"
DING! DING! DING! We have a winner!
Madelyn then came up to me and said " ok, Mom, I'll go back, but I don't want you to come with me."
GREAT! Cause I really don't want to come back there with you!
She headed back and less than 5 minutes later she was back out and headed straight out the car.
The LOVELY d.h. came out and said, "well that's all we have time for, we got nothing done because she waisted her appointment slot in the bathroom. She'll have to come back for her cleaning and x-rays. (Later I found out they don't have any slots available until mid-July...nice! Oh yes, they did charge me too!)
and then she said " by the way, you better stick to those consequences you told her, cause if you don't, you will have a HORRIBLE teen!"
I was SOOOO DONE. I appologized to her about all of this and she continued with her unsolicited advice laced with a horrible bitter attitude. I tried to be kind over and over and she was less than kind even seeing my situation.
At this point, I was REALLY wanting to know that I could come home from a day like this and fall into Nate's arms and cry. I wanted so badly to tell him all about it. But it was days later before we could communicate.
So it was a reminder, that GOD DID supply all my needs, HE was there the whole time. I know that it was NOT natural for a parent to some how NOT loose thier mind through all that. There is no other way to explain it, it was by God's grace.
So next time you take your kids to the dentist...have a little laugh on me :) It's ok, I'm close to seeing the humor in it all...close. One day I know it will be funny, just not yet. Especially since she has yet to go back!
PLEASE PRAY FOR ME...oh wait...I'm making NATE take her next time!